Making Lemonade: Healing Part Two
Relationships: Acceptance Is the Key to Recovering from your Divorce
Divorce has many effects, but one thing is consistent: it’s painful whether you ended the relationship or your partner left you. People can suffer either way.
If you were the one that was deeply in love with your spouse and the divorce hit you out of left field, so to speak, you may need more than half the time of your relationship’s duration to make a full recovery. Then again, if you had a ten-year marriage, of which the last eight years meant staying together for the kids, or if you were living under the same roof but living parallel lives, the time needed for your healing may lessen dramatically. Unfortunately, there is no magic pill to heal from divorce. It is never easy to deal with life’s losses and how they manifest themselves.
Once you are realistic about your situation and reach a place of acceptance, however, you should be applauded. From this position, it is easier to identify where you are in your healing process, sometimes known as the “tunnel.” If you can see the light at the end of your tunnel, know that things will only get better. At this point, the world will start to seem brighter and certain memories won’t get triggered as much by what someone says, or by a song, or a smell. During this time, it is best to concentrate on other things in your life, such as hobbies, family, friends, or anything that will keep you happy until you reach the other side. The good news is that you will find a way to get through it. And, at the end of the tunnel, you may find that life is much better than you imagined.
As they say, there are no accidents in life, and that emergence from the end of the tunnel can be extremely gratifying, once you get there. So stay the course. You will make it. Acceptance is key and then you are more than half way there.