There Is So Much To Love About Single Parenting
It’s almost impossible to make this list exclusive to the joys of single parenthood since any parent (married or divorced) can relate…. but here are my reasons:
I love knowing that I have read at least 2 books to my kids every single night, come rain or shine, come sickness or health, come thunderstorm and no electricity (yes, by lantern), since the day they were born. I take great pride in this and hope they grow up with a love of reading. (They better!)
I love having inside jokes with my kids. You come to my house and say hippopotamus in casual conversation (who doesn’t?) and my kids will break out in song. You will have no idea what is happening as two little kids run around you singing the ‘I wanta hippopotamus for Christmas’ song. But I’ll know. And love it.
I love how they roll their eyes when I tell them I love them. It’s such a given to them. Never a doubt in their minds. 100% sure. No matter how much I think I’m failing at this single parenting thing, they have supreme confidence in me. Wow.
I love how my son refuses to put milk in his cereal but pours it into my daughter’s bowl for her because he knows she prefers it that way. I love how nonchalant he is about that, not making a big deal of it, not calling attention to this ‘nice act’, just doing it while chatting about something else. ahhhh. Crossing all fingers and toes he maintains that all the way into adulthood and in relationships.
I love how my daughter is teaching my son to read by holding up the book so he can see it and reads with animation in her voice….’the big BAD wolf JUMPED!”. And when my son actually flinches, she giggles quietly and turns her head so he doesn’t get embarrassed.
I love that my kids get excited about pajamas. ‘Yeah, it’s pajama time!’
I love that when I splurge and buy some coffee ice cream, I know that tomorrow and the next day and the next day there will still be some left… never have to hear the ‘oh, I ate it’ thing when I’m craving.
I love how being a single parent has fast-forwarded my education: I quickly learned that so much of life is ridiculous. Need to feel successful? Rich? Admired? Get under a bunch of covers with your kids, popcorn and a funny movie. If you don’t feel great when they start laughing and snuggling up next to you, you’ve missed the boat.
I love that I decide how every penny will be spent or saved or given away. No more allowances to my ex. No more fighting over his debt or failure to pay bills.
I love that I have the occasional weekends free to sleep in late, do nothing, do everything, and do whatever I want.
I love that my life is no longer second fiddle. If I were still married I would have given up my career, moved to a city I don’t like, been 3 hours from friends and family and living with a cheating husband that can’t keep a job for more than a year.
I love that if I want to have a backwards day with the kids (desert for breakfast, breakfast for dinner etc), there is nobody there who would ruin it by insisting it was silly or that he needed to eat a real meal.
I love that as a single mother I sometimes get an automatic get out of jail free card for some things….like this morning, running late and harried as usual, I delivered my kids to school, tried a 2 minute catch up conversation with the teachers, talked to my co-worker and then realized I had a bright yellow sticky note pad stuck to my chest that was screaming out for the world to see that I was in need of bread, coffee, and laundry detergent. (Yes, it was the only place I could put it and still remember to do it…try it, it works).
I guess there are a ton of things that I could say that are mean spirited towards my ex….like how I get to see all the firsts and how I know which one likes pb&j vs. pb&fluff, but I don’t want this to be about how I’m winning somehow. He is missing out on things that can never, ever be replayed. Once and gone. He doesn’t know. But nobody knows what they don’t know, right?
