Check out marriagebuilders.com Dr. Harley has some great ideas for exactly the situation you are in. There may be some way to salvage things still. But it might take lots of work on your part that you may not emotionally feel like doing.
As far as your wife not being "in love." That really is a maturity thing in my opinion. Those of us who have been in two marriages sort of get it. Love is a verb. It is something you do every day. It's not something that magically is bestowed upon you. If you have needs that are not getting met by your partner than the onus is on you to communicate that. I have a sister who spent 25 years chasing that "in love" feeling. Usually at the 2 or 3 year mark the gig would be up and she would need to move on to a new guy. Now that she's older I think she's finally figured it out.
All the best!