Struggling with ending my marriage

How do you know when it’s time to separate, or even divorce? I have been married for almost 12 years. I have really never wanted to have sex with my husband. He has never gotten me going in that way. I even cried on our honeymoon because the pressure of having sex from him was unbearable and I just felt horrible. I loved the man as a person but I just didn’t have the physical attraction I guess.

I have been feeling uneasy for the last 6 + months. I was trying to figure out if I was going through something or if it was my marriage. I finally one day had to tell him how I was feeling about him and my issues with intimacy. I was getting turned on but not by him and I was wanting to act on those feelings but not with him.

He was heartbroken to say the least. We started counseling immediately at his request. We have been going weekly for 7 weeks now. I am still struggling. I want to take care of myself and make sure that I am happy, but worrying about how my husband feels and how it will affect my kids keeps getting in the way.

How long should I keep trying counseling? When is enough to say “I’ve tried and I want to move on.”

r u also seeking therapy on your own??
marriage v. personal therapy is different.

As far as the sex goes…that is something that you can control and he needs to respect.

So you love him for his role as a parent, as person, but you don’t physically love him.
I can tell you right now that unless something changes…you guys will not last. Sorry to say.

Cause you are not IN LOVE with him. You may love him…but I firmly believe that being IN love is a conscious thing. Something that you do, not just that it’s there.

You don’t know what you are saying you are actually headed for pain… those your thoughts are nonsense…