There isn't and will never be a "right time" to do this.
I've been married 18 yrs., we have 4 kids. Sadly, I can't remember the last time that the 6 of us had a good time as a family because of how things are going between my wife and I. Although we're still together, we simply don't speak to each other anymore (we only speak about kids stuff). Sex? In 2017 just a couple of times during october and november, since then, haven't had it in 2018.
I've had terrible stuff happening at work, the amount of pressure has been terrible. But also, I've done great things and have received public awards. In any case, it is frustrating not being able to share the good and the bad. The amount of loneliness is overwhelming.
I've offered to her going to couples therapy, in both times she ended up not opening to conversation with the therapist.
A month ago I told her that I could look for another job in another city and that could give us the perfect excuse to separate. She did not responded, told me she needed time to assimilate things. She hasn't told me anything yet.
What she claims? She says I am to tought on our oldest, a 14 yr. old teen daughter.
I've never been physically violent, I do raise my voice. But I have learned to control myself and also, because this is the reason she and I argue, I try to avoid talking with my kid without her being present (that way she can see I try to meet her "standards").
Anyway, she is an constant state of anger and resentment. There is no sense in waiting anymore, I've got to run from this silent, of this lack of attention and indifference.
It breaks my heart what my kids will go through but this is unsustainable for me.