Hi, I am new to this, but my therapist said that joining an online support group like this might help. Last Monday, I found out that my husband has been having an affair since November and he got her pregnant and she’s due in October. I found this out through anonymous Myspace messages.
One of the things that hurts the most is he knew I wanted a baby very badly and he said that he never wanted another one, but since he couldn’t convince her to get rid of it he’s decided to step up and play daddy. I should mention that we have an 11-year old daughter ourselves. I just don’t understand how my daughter and I can mean so little to him that he would do this in the first place and then choose to continue a relationship with her, even though he says it’s only a friendship, but they trade over 30 text messages a day, plus 10 or more phone calls. I mean I understand that it's not about me it's about him, but yet I still don't understand. She's married on her way to divorce with 4 kids and has a history (which he kew about) of going to bars for the past couple years and picking up men.
I work a good job, go to school and have supported him in all the stupid decisions he's made like quitting a really good job to end up delivering pizzas. I’m sorry I know I’m rambling, but there’s just so much that I don’t understand. I am trying to cut myself off from him other than to arrange things with him seeing our daughter, but it is very hard since I love his family and am best friends with his sister.
Everyone says that I am better off without him since he did this before when we were first married, but it’s so hard. I thought it might help to talk to women that are going through similar situations that might better understand that it is not as simple. I would appreciate any thoughts and support. Thank you.