There's a lot of pain, blame, and lack of communication here, so I guess this is where my grief can go.
Since my wife and I got married about 4 years ago, we've had sex an average of once a month. The previous stretch was a month and a half, and now I'm on a two month stretch.
To those of you who say your wife gives stupid reasons to not have sex, you need to listen more closely. It's deeper than what she's saying, because what's really going on is in the part of the brain that doesn't control speech. When a partner doesn't want sex, they're feeling very empty and broken, and sex would only break them further. That's why they're limp during sex. They're breaking, but they do it anyway because they see your pain, and they're trying to pick a perfect middle ground so they can (1) not feel so terrible after sex and (2) not make you resent them.
My wife has been open and honest with me about what keeps her from feeling intimate. Some of it has been me. Most of it has been anxiety put on her by the world. I'm not saying it's easy. I actually came here to vent my frustration, but I can actually see her side. She can find her way out of her dark time if you can make her believe you're supporting her through it, and if you can make her believe that you don't expect sex. It's painful, and it's a leap off of Faith Cliff, and you have to follow through by not bringing up the lack of sex. At least, this is how I plan to overcome this dry spell.
