Nurse, read my response to another of your posts for a more complete answer. I stayed and got everything together. I did not go until I had a three-bedroom, two-and-a-half bath house with a garage to move into. I had a great attorney who let me know I do NOT have to settle for living in a dive apartment above some bar in a bad neighborhood just because the ex thinks I don’t deserve part of his paycheck. Too frickin’ bad.Look, you know what I hear behind your uncertainty? FEAR. We all have it. We all hate it. Fear is at the root of our willing to accept a spouse who cheats or drinks or abuses us. FEAR is why you tolerate a man who fucks other women and then comes home and wants to have sex with you. You are afraid of being alone, of being unloved, of living in poverty, of letting your kids down…I know, because I have been there.Tap into your anger, girlfriend. GET YOUR MAD ON. Like my momma always said, you are too fat to be a rug! Then use that anger to fuel your exit. As long as you are uncertain, he will use this against you, trying to get you to accept the status quo so he can go on screwing around. Get mad and get an attorney. And then make him pay for what he did. What you do now will affect the rest of your life. Divorce, as Julie says, is all about the Benjamins (the ones on the $100 bill). If you accept less than you should, you will never get the chance to get more. So put on your big girl panties and go whack a few baseballs, picturing his privates with every swing.
