Confronting my husband's lover. What would you do?

What would you do to the person who had an affair with your spouse? I want to confront her in person. She ruined my life. I want to embarass and humiliate her.

She connected with him on facebook and knew he was married. I want to make sure she NEVER goes near a married man again. My husband and I are trying to work through the situation. He does not have relations with her anymore. It only lasted a couple months. I am very angry with her. I have her phone number and I am on the verge finding her name.

I know my anger should be directed toward my husband but he is probably getting a divorce and will pay for the rest of his life. I am a good, loving, hardworking, dedicated person. He is going to lose me and that will be his punishment. It is very sad. We have been married for 10 years and have a 7 year old daughter.

I want her to pay. I want to bring a picture of our family to her work and let everyone know what a low-life scumbucket she it. I do not want to get in trouble for harassment but I am willing to push limits. What would you do?

Also, my husband’s friend contacted her several months ago. (I was not aware of this or even the affair at the time.) He told her to stay away from our family. She didn’t feel she was a homewrecker because it took two people. They bantered back and forth. She closed her facebook page after that.She needs to know that she wrecked our home and destroyed my little girl’s chance of an intact family. I want to be sure she never does this to another family. EVER.

Don’t under any circumstances confront her.Don’t under any circumstances waste emotional energy on her.Don’t under any circumstances say things like, I’m willing to push limits.The divorce will be more than enough to deal with, you don’t want to make trouble for anyone, including yourself.Here’s what you need to think: What is best for me? Then do it.Nothing you can do can ever ensure that she’ll never go after another married man again. So forget about that.And ask yourself, why did my husband do this? You know it takes two to tango, right…?

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when I found out my husband was cheating on me it hurt more than his cruel actions or abuse. They made a baby from this affair. In my eyes, she was the reason why my marriage was not working. It was her fault that I could not forgive him or trust him again. I was angry and hurt. Maybe even a bit vindictive. My children and I ran away from my husband because of his fist and his actions. I could not take any more. But, it was during that time that I began understanding this woman was not entirely at fault. He was involved also. I directed my hostility toward her because it was easier than accepting the truth. It was him, also. Regardless of how or who, when, or what occurred. It occurred. Nothing I could say or do could change what happened. And he placed his wife and children through this. It showed an overwhelming lack of respect for his home. It showed how self centered he was. And most of all, it made me realize I deserve better and so do my children. He told me it was a mistake. But, in the end it was one of many mistakes, he made. I did not. When he came to me and told me she was pregnant and he didn’t know what to do, I was already seperated and looking forward to the divorce. He said he still loved me. I blankly looked at him and told him sometimes when you make your bed you’ve got to lie in it. Your angry and you have every right. But, your angry with her. He is the one that overlook your commitment and trust. He is the one that disrespected you. Confronting her will not help. It will only compound your emotions and make it worse on you. Direct your anger at him and either the two of you learn to trust eachother again and get help for your marriage, or let him go.

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Wow. Did i write this?? I totally hear you. Your story is incredibly close to mine. I did ring her, i did tell her she was f@&£%€g my husband…i tried a couple of times to get her to talk to me, purely to hear her side if things and i believed (if there was an ounce of decency in her) it took her to act like a victim to make me realise she wasnt a decent person. How can she be if she has relations with married men who have young children. The satisfaction of hearing her drop the phone and not able to say anything but a gurgle was enough. I am since tempted to aggravate her some more. I understand people saying Leave it be shes not worth it and shes not…but…if its going to amuse you and you get a bit of satisfaction by rocking her boat, as long as her kids dont witness anything, do what youve got to do. A couple of rules, kids not witnessing things and dont get arrested. Apart from that, have some fun. I just sold my exhusband on facebook, was hysterical(didnt use his real photo) butbthe selling descritpion got alot of laughs

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You think it would make you feel better but it doesn’t. Let it alone and move on. You will heal with time!