My wife and I have been married 9 years. We have 2 beautiful kids together, 3 & 7. We also have 2 beautiful teens from previous relationships that live with their perspective parents.
My wife recently "snapped" and decided to emotionally separate herself from me. It's just a snowball effect of everything that has happened throughout our marriage. Although I never cheated on her, I was selfish, dishonest, barely valued her opinion, verbally abused, and on 3 separate occasions, there was physical abuse. I was recently diagnosed at a mental health facility as a "Stuffer". I hold everything in until I reach a tipping point. Now with the arguing with my wife; if I did try to walk away or ignore her, that even infuriated her more. Whether it was getting at me for not cleaning or whatever.
She is a very strong minded and opinionated person. I am not trying to justify what I did, because to any degree, the physical abuse was totally wrong on my part when I "snapped". This is one of the many reasons I did have to goto a facility to deal with the guilt and anguish of what I have done. Other prime factors for my personality and emotional distress was our son was born with disabilities in 2003 and my wife had a stroke in 2005. Having to deal with both has affected me tremendously.
My wife says when she first met me I was ambitious and had a good head on my shoulders. But I can honestly admit that these 2 situations has dampered what I once was. Fast forward to 2009, I lose my job and have been unemployed since. Within the last year is when we had our last big fight and me being submitted to the facility because I did want to end my life (expressing it, no actual attempts).
Since we are both unemployed, we have no choice but to continue to live under the same roof. We are cordial for the sake of the kids, because they have gone through enough. But she currently expresses no desire for counseling or going to church together. She says she is done with me. I love her with all my heart and every fabric of my being. I am truly sorry for everything I have done in the past. I will do anything for a fresh start with her. Anything.