Detective Gives Tips on How to Catch Your Spouse if He or She Is Having an Affair
Q: I think my spouse may be cheating, how can I tell?
A:There are several signs to look for if you think your spouse may be cheating on you, but let’s face it you know them better than anyone. We can usually sense when our spouse is unfaithful, we don’t need signs. I am not just talking to you as a private investigator, but as someone who has been there and done that. I am remarried now, and but I drove in and outof the parking lot of a private investigator’s office three times before I went in and hired him to follow my former husband. My advice to you is to do it and get the closure, so that you can move on without wondering or feeling guilty.
I had a feeling that my ex was cheating on me. At the time, I was not a private investigator. I saw a sign for a private investigator in the community I lived in. Well, I drove in that parking lot three times and changed my mind all three times; little did I know that this man was going to be my future husband and soul mate. Wow, there is a happy ending before you even hear the whole story.
I was always fascinated by private investigating, and with my ex, I became an amateur one, but do not do that. If you gather the facts yourself, in many states it is not admissible in court, and you can be charged with stalking. But I am getting a bit ahead of myself. Let me tell you the signs of a cheating spouse. Here they are:
1. No longer interested in intimacy?
Does he or she come home smelling like perfume or cologne or have makeup stains on his clothes? Well if you don’t use perfume or cologne or makeup, guess what. Working a lot of hours, going to work early. Spending a lot of time on the computer, and suddenly he or she now has a password that you can not access. Extra miles on the vehicle. Hanging around with new friends. Suddenly having a new hobby. Hiding the phone bill, ripping it up before you can see it. Unexpected purchase of new cell phone or pager.
2. Stopped wearing a wedding ring.
Saying I need my time, space, etc. Less attentive. He or she wants to know where you are all the time. Is he or she easily distracted, daydreams a lot? Is he or she spending less time with the family? Have you asked him or her, and he or she says “You are crazy, it is your imagination.”?
These are just some of the signs. There are more, but you will know.
I am giving you advice as a private investigator and as someone who has been through it. Take a deep breath. Look at what you have going for you, and yes, each of you has so much going for you. You had the intelligence to check out this Web site. If you doubt yourself, it is only because of what you are going through.
Do not let him or her know you suspect. Do this right. Protect yourself, your assets and your dignity. If you think that your spouse is cheating on you, get all the facts, so you do not blow it if you are going to go to court. We have seen it happen, and you end up with nothing. Don’t tip your hand.
Hire a private investigator, get the facts that you can present in court. One way or the other you will put your mind at ease. You will get the facts that you need to for court or you will find out that he or she is faithful and just going through some wacky phase. Nine times out of 10, he is not going through a phase. He is cheating.
If you discuss a case with a private investigator, it is totally confidential. Your spouse will never know you hired us and will never know they were followed. You just need to realize that unfortunately, so many men and woman do cheat. If you go to court with videotape of your spouse and the other person together and a written report from a private investigator, then you will walk away with your fair share.
If you think your spouse is cheating, it is probably not your imagination. Don’t confront them or they will become cautious and ruin your chance of getting the evidence that you will need.The best way to heal is to protect yourself and get the closure you need. If you are going through this, call us and we will listen and help you plan your best move. We won’t push you into a divorce; we will just help you gather the facts, in case it does happen.
Also remember, there is hope, I found the light at the end of the tunnel. To finish my story, I met my present husband a year after my divorce, and we fell instantly in love. I got my private investigator license, and we became Mr. and Mrs. Detective.
About the author: Mrs. Detective works in the Northeast as a private investigator with mainly family law cases.
